a little journey (not the band...)

Well it seems that we are now 7 weeks into this little journey of ours. Each day brings new challenges, new wonders and an overwhelming sense of love and purpose. It's so amazing to look into this little person's eyes and see a part of your own. His smile is unlike anything I've ever witnessed. And of course his smell makes my knees weak. The nights are getting better but neither of us are getting all that much sleep still. But somehow it all seems to go away when I hold him close and he looks up at me with such curiosity and innocence. We all three took our first shower together today which was by far the most amazing shower I have ever had. And he didn't cry once! In fact we even got a smile out of him when we dried him off. Those are the moments I don't ever want to forget. Those are the moments that I'll be remembering when he's 16 years old and telling me how stupid I am. Ahh, the life of a parent. One that I will soon know so well....

Our new baby is now two weeks old.  He is beautiful and gets more and more beautiful every day. Even when I have only gotten about 4 hours of sleep in 24 hours.  Even when my vagina is throbbing because the only way to calm our beautiful boy is to walk and talk.  Even when I am starving and dehydrated but I can't move because the little one is on my chest and if I move one inch he will wake up and scream.  Even when I have only left the apartment once in the last two weeks and that was to go to the Dentist.  Even with all of that....I still love him.  I am still amazed that he is mine and that he came out of me.  That I am a Mom and that he is my son.  In awe at every little face he makes, every little thing that comes out of every little orafice.  I actually like the smell of his pooh.  I can't help it.  Don't get me wrong though.  I am still scared.  I still worry all the time that I won't be able to help him or fix him when he needs me too.  Ahhh.  The life of a new Mom. Crazy.  Never thought it would happen to me. 

Owwwww!!!

I suppose that something so beautiful cannot come easy. I suppose that this is life's little way of saying "Take that, bitch." And so it is with having a baby. Yes he's the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen in my life. Yes he hurt my lover like all hell when he came out. Do we love him all the same? You bet. After all, he didn't create 17 hours of painful hell for his mommy on purpose did he? He was just along for the ride the same way she was. Only her ride was a little more excruciating. But one look into his big blue eyes sure makes it all okay. If only for a moment. Then the pain creeps back in...owwwwww.......

EDD

EDD BS...or Estimated Due Date Bull Shit!!!! It's been 4 days since this baby was supposed to come out.  I know that I am supposed to be enjoying the calm before the storm but that is not me.  I feel like my life is on hold and it's driving me crazy.  I don't want to wait anymore.  I want to start the next part of this life and meet this person that has been kicking the crap out of me for the last few months.  Granted, I have been very lucky and have had quite an easy 10 months.  Besides the leg cramps and occassional feeling of awkwardness that is. But, now, this waiting has been the hardest part....ever!!! We have done the spicy food, the walking, the sex, the primrose oil, etc.  The only thing I have not done is the castor oil and I really really don't want to do that.  So, I guess I will just wait.  Which is what I have been doing for 3 weeks now.  Waiting.  Ahhhhhh.  I nested way to early.  That's what I get for being a super organized person.  

back jack and blog it again...

So here we are again bloggin till we can't stop. With my crazy busy weeks these days it's good to know that Meola and I will always find time to bond when I sit down at the computer. In fact it's like she's magnetized to my lap. The second I sit down there she is. Purring like she's never purred before. She's truly a purr-niac. That's for sure. 

We got some nice snow yesterday. The view from our living room is truly a glorious thing when it snows. Sadly enough it's all but gone now. And I didn't even have time to build me a snow person. I didn't get to build anything politically correct with snow for that matter...drat. Oh well. There's always next time. 

late night beginnings...

...or should I say early morning endings...Once again I'm up late dorking out on YouTube music videos with my plank in hand. Playing some one on one with the greats of the greats. There was discussion of a blog today. An official T, C, and M blog discussion. A new beginning if you will. An electronic undertaking to the mold of a certain "hip" brother and sister-in-law-in-rad.  And so here we are. Late night/early morning dancing with ones and zeros. Apparently blogs are "all that." However recent studies conclude that "that" is relatively relative.  Oh well. At least we try...